Please Excuse the Typos...

Yeah, so all my posts have typos. I could eliminate them with a quick click of the mouse, but what the heck. That would be way too easy, and so not me. I speak in typos, so why not write in them also?

I broke down and bought some sleeping pills. I had been trying to lull myself to sleep with amaretto sours.. I love amaretto sours.. but they just weren't doing the charm and after three nights of having three drinks and feeling nothing but wanting another drink I have decided that I do not need to add alcholism to my growing list of problems and have given up the amaretto... well, at least cut back.

Today Mary and I went into town and did some christmas shopping. She bought Brenden a present. I let her pick it out. She then wanted to "look" at her some toys. She pointed out about half a million of them that she wants. We had a good time together. She was my big girl and I got her some lip gloss. She is convinced that she has to wear lip gloss to school. She is such a girly girl. I go around half the time with no makeup and my hair in a pony tail. Actually today Mary asked me to keep my hair down, she said, "momma, you always wear your hair up, why don't you where it down? It's pretty." So, I did. I should have turned the tables on her because she always wears it down. I did get like three compliments on my hair though... maybe I should listen to the beauty tips coming from my five year old.

Clinicals are tommorrow. I am kind of looking foward to it. I don't really like the clinical site, but my great grandmother lives there and I enjoy seeing her. There is a nurse at the "home" who actually carries a spit cup around with her. You can imagine the disgust on our faces when she took it in with her to do wound care. YUM, just imagine having some nice juicy spit in your wound, or maybe she might get some nice infection in her mouth.


I took the last of my tests today. I don't know what I made on the last one, but I rocked the first two. I really kicked ass. I am glad because I studied so freaking hard for those tests. I was nervous taking one test. I just knew I was going to bomb it. I even sang my little "I am going to fail" song before taking it. Yes, I sing it outloud, so that everyone can hear it... well, people sitting around me anyway. I didn't bomb it. Maybe I should start singing that song before every test...

Anyway, taking my typos and going to bed. Peace out my homies

OH, I just remembered my homies I got out of the machine at Giant. I thought they were so neat....

Somewhere Over the Rainbow

First of all, Jay I just want you to know that I was thinking of you today. You were on my mind... like Georgia was on Ray Charles mind. I love that song. The original song. I heard this chopped up rappy remix today and at first thought awww... I love that song. It quickly changed to WTF is this. I have sang Georgia to who else but Georgia, a lady I work with. Why would you name your child Georgia? Odd isn't it? Maybe I will name my next child Nebraska, or maybe Illinois. That way everyone can fight over how it's name is pronounced. hahaha. I want to go to bed. I am earning for my bed, but my son is at my sista's which means I have to wait up on him. He wanted to wait for his uncle to come home so he could say hi. So, I am waiting patiently, impatiently for him to come home.

Oh, some chick in my class is convinced that sperm do not die if ingested. She thinks that they can go from esophagus to anus and make it out alive. I didn't say anything (I had already said too much) but semen has a PH of 7.4 and gastric juices have a PH of like 3.5 or 4 depending on the person. There is no way sperm could live in these conditions.


My wish list for Christmas includes:

Gwen Stephani's Abs
A lifetime supply of chocolate (nonfat, no calorie, and great tasting of course)
To go to Willy Wonka's Chocolate Factory. I always wanted to eat the icing mushrooms.
A new car! (said in the voice of the Wheel or Fortune announcer)
To be able to sleep all night long for a month.
To be uber smart without having to try (although when I fixed my network the other day at moms was brilliant.)
To be able to dance like a black girl
To be able to ballroom dance like a rich white girl
To solve a rubix cube
To play Sims bustin' out for 24 hours straight (that kinda messes with the sleep wish doesn't it?)
To have WIRELESS INTERNET at my house
To have my boobs to be perky again
To never have try feet again.
To always be able to say the right thing, (I never say the right thing)
To celebrate my parent's 80th wedding anniversary, with all of us living.

Ok, I'm bored. I am going to legally download some possibly copyrighted music. I said POSSIBLY and LEGALLY... Besides.. It's not like I took the Christ out of X-mas... HA!

So stupid bitch lady had the nerve to cuss my brother in law out because she didn't like the sign at his place of business. It did not say Christmas... it said something like Happy Holidays. She was pissed (like most of these crazy dumbass biblethumpers) that the business didn't have Christmas. We are taking the Christ out of christmas she said. I wish I would have been there to take her wrapping paper out of her cart, along with her tree ornaments, tinsel, presents and holiday candy throw all of it in the floor in front of her fat ass and tell her that those things she was about to purchase had NOTHING to do with christ and everything to do with commercialism and paganism and that if she wanted to put christ back in christmas then she best just get on home. People are so stupid. Maybe I am overreacting, but I believe if we pass on to our children our views, values, and beliefs and get them in there before everyone else tries to fill their heads with what they think is right then it won't matter if the sign says Happy Holidays, Merry Christmas, or Kiss My Ass they will know what I have taught them. If they chose to live by it when they get older is up to them. That's my take on it...

like buttah...

You wanna know what I hate???? I hate being awake at 2am and not doing anything fun. I hate not being able to sleep. This is bullshit. I should be counting sheep by now, sawing logs, swimming in fairy dust or whatever you want to call it. I should be unconscious and have active REM going on!!! I don't. I can't. I've studied until my eyes hurt. I think I know all the things I should know, and will bullshit my way through the rest. Yeah, I said it... I meant it too. I am tired of being tired all the time. I don't mean to be grumpy, and I'm not in a horrible mood, I'm just exhausted and there is nothing I can do to get some sleep!!!!!


I just checked on my order status and am kind of irritated that I ordered three items and they sent them all in different packages. Go freaking figure. Why???

Maybe you should Drive..

Monday. Monday sucks. I couldn't sleep last night. I kept having dreams that people from my past were trying to kill me. Odd dreams. I got up and studied. I was sitting at my dining room table, the entire house quiet, me knee deep in concentration when my phone vibrates with a message. I about jumped four feet in the air. I immediately though bad thoughts towards a certain person who shall remain nameless, although I will say that he lives in Owasso and drives a silver Xterra. HMMM... I immediately text back, without answering his question asking him what he is doing awake at 2am. It's funny looking back, I think I was more startled than anything. He fires the same question back at me and I resume studying. When I finally get in bed it's close to around 3am. I fall asleep only to be awakened around 430 with these bright lights moving across my bedroom ceiling. You know how a cars headlights look as it turns and the lights splash into your house? Well, it was like that, only it's impossible to have a car's headlights splash in my bedroom. The lights were bright enough to wake me up and I laid there looking at them move across my ceiling for a few minutes wondering what they were until it hit me that it might be my christmas tree on fire. I jump out of bed and go into the living room. The tree is fine. The twinkling bulbs are the only lights that are on in the house. I think about this when I lay back down in bed and notice how freaking dark it is now compared to five minutes ago. I didn't think about it long though, seeing as both of my kids and the dog had made their way into my bed. I tried to get some sleep and my alarm didn't go off until 630. We were running right on time, the kids were getting dressed pretty quickly when Mary lets out this howl "MMMOOOMMMMIIIIEEEEE" I go into the bathroom to see what could be the issue now. I find that my daughter has a huge lump of pink bubble gum stuck in her hair. "Oh Shit." I think. I put cold water on her hairy gum wad and try to work as much of the hair out as I can, going as quickly as I can because I CANT be late. I finally cut the last few strands out. I get the kids in the car and off we go. I drop them off, blow Mary about fifteen kisses by the time she finally walks through the school door, and get myself headed off to school. Absent mindedly I take my chap stick that Mary had used and tuck it between my legs so that I won't lose it as I drive to school, and guess what I find? A hole, in my pants. Yes, the day just keeps getting better and better. I have on these velour (howeveryouspellit) pants and they have a two inch hole in the thigh. Just fantastic. I get to school and go into my advisors office. Does she have a saftey pin.... for my crotch....? Do I promise to give it back? Do I buy her another one? I am just glad she has one. I go to the ladies, secure my pants from showing the world my blue undies and get back to class all before 8. Whew.. that's it right? Wrong. I didn't eat breakfast, and had an early dinner the night before so my sugar bottomed out and I felt like total shit during my test. I just knew I did poorly. I didn't, but I was worried about it. I keep wanting to play PS2. That's all I want to do for like three hours is play Sims. PLEASE!!!! I can't. I don't have time. Time sucks. I remember when I used to have time. I also had no life. I want to play PS2 for one day with no interruptions. Anyway, I have to study. I have another test tommorrow that I want to do well on. I will be SOOOO glad when break gets here.

If you wanna get down..

Today we got out of the "home" early and a few of us cut out to Polo's for some drinks. It was an odd group of us heading out for the bar in the middle of the afternoon. It was a blast. Leah convinced me to try a shot of liquid cocaine. Wow... is all I can say. I am not sure what it had in it. I only know it had to contain some after shock or hot damn, and whatever liquor it is that has the little gold flakes. Whoa... it was like drinking liquid fire that made you feel all minty fresh and burning. It was good, but I don't think I will have another one of those. We all had mixed drinks... We were all way too loud, and it was great. We discussed things that were totally unappropiate and had a great time. It was good fun and a great way to relax. Now to get ready for tonight.... whhahahahaha!

Baby, it's cold outside....

correction... it's FREEZING!!! This week has been crazy. It has gone by so quickly. I had clinicals at another nameless, faceless, nursing home this week. It went pretty well. So friends and I went to the Barking Frog for lunch... all I can say is IT'S DELICIOUS. After lunch I helped feed the residents who could not feed themselves. I had one get mad at me when I wouldn't allow him to drink another residents milk. He has dysphagia and needed thickner so I couldn't just let him drink it. I am sure that if could have spoken he would have cussed me out.
After helping him to his room, changing, and putting him down for a nap I looked to help pass out trays to the residents who choose to eat in their rooms. As luck would have it on my second tray to be delivered I came into the room and this lady was sitting on the edge of her bed. I called her by name and asked her if she was ready for lunch. She replied yes, could I turn the lights on? The lights were on, overhead, end table lamp and the shade were up allowing the afternoon sun to shine brightly in onto the empty bed on the other side of the small room. "I can't see" She says again. My heart just sank. I am seeing myself in sixty years, I think to myself. I tell her that the lights are on and that I will stay with her and help her with lunch. She thanks me several times telling me that she just can't see to get around. I sit beside her on the bed and get her tray ready. I take her silverware and put them in her right hand. I then take that hand and "show" her where all the items are on her tray. meat, above that bread, to to the left carrots, and above them is a piece of chocolate cake. She readies her spoon and I put the napkin in her lap, (telling her first so she doesn't think I am molesting or robbing her.) To pass the amount of time between bites (it takes longer to eat as you get older) I make small talk with her. I love doing this with the older residents. Most of them have had so many different experiences and lives and it's wonderful to hear about them. She is nintey seven. She was born in Oklahoma but her Daddy was a farmer who always wanted to do better so they moved a lot growing up. She told me they would just get a nice house and get settled and he would move them. "He ended up with nothing" She said. She had two older brothers and before the "others" came her daddy used to play the fiddle and have her and her brothers dance. "Oh he taught us to dance!" She said, and her pale blue eyes lit up behind her thick glasses. The "others" turned out to me four more brothers and three more sisters. She said when the others started coming that daddy worked all the time and didn't play the fiddle anymore. During this time I am helping her with various foods and she eventually uses her finger to push the food onto the spoon after locating both food and spoon. She tells me about picking cotton, and how when the depression came the cotton wasn't worth anything and fields of the white fluff would go without being picked. She said that most people couldn't afford to pay someone to help pick it, because it was almost worthless. They turned the cows in on it. She told me she had her back broken twice. Once by a horse. I asked her what she did as an adult and if she was married. She told me that she had quit school in the third grade to help her family survive, and that she had always wanted to finish. She told me she married young, when she was 17. " I shouldn't have," she said with the twinkle in her eye. "He loved all the ladies." "Oh how handsome he was." She said he only hit her once. "Maybe it was becaused we fussed at each other so." She said she is not sure why he ended up marrying her... " I was a red headed freckle face girl." He did marry her though and they had four children in four years. She told me that she had often told him that he was going to get killed out there on the railroad and he assured her that he would be fine, nothing would happen to him. Sure enough, he was killed. He was drunk and fell from one of the cars onto the tracks and was crushed by a freight train. "I was left with four children and no means to provide for them." She said. She mentioned how handsome he was again, and how he loved the ladies... He was a handsome, womanizing, drunken pig but she loved him. She told me that her second husband was a bachelor and was a good man. He always treated her nicely and she said that if she would get cross or mean he would say, "Don't you think that's a dreadful thing to say? Aren't you ashamed?" She said it make her think about what she said before she said it. She was married to him for four years when one evening they were eating dinner and he stood up and fell over dead. Four years.. She said after that she didn't marry again until she was 80. Then she married a minister and was with him until he died. I just thought this was so bizarre. To bury three husbands. The first two in her before she was forty. How tragic. I am getting tired so I won't bother writing the rest tonight. I just really enjoyed talking to her. We can learn so much from other people if we just take the time to listen to them.

Pour Me

Tonight I rented The Polar Express. The kids and I watched it. It was great. I cried. Yes, I cried. It was the best night I've had in a long time. Brenden, Mary, Tilly and me curled up on the couch watching a movie. I didn't worry about the dishes, or homework, or anything until it was over... then I went nuts trying to do everything before it got too late. I have been doing some christmas shopping. I hate it. I never know if my gifts will be wanted or not. I always want to get something really cool, but don't know what "really cool" is. Oh well, I am hoping that I did ok this year. I had a pretty good weekend. I dare say my stress level has been up and I've been tormenting those I care about most over small trivial things. All I can do is cross my fingers and hope that you all know me well enough to know that I will chill out in a few days.

Today in Walmart I was SOOO ready to go home, you know that line that forms around five pm and doesn't go away until midnight? I was in it... and I was at that point in the day where you are so tired all you want to do is go home and take a nap. I was ready to go home. I made it out and did just that. For some reason I've had White lightening on my head all day long. I think I woke up this morning with it on my mind.

.. tried to book him but my pappy kept on cooking....
........wheeewww... white lightening!

I let Dragon come in for a little bit last night. Bad decision. Dog chewed Brenden's glasses, broke a christmas ornament, tormented Tilly, sniffed everywhere.... and made me miserable. He got the BOOT outside. Bren didn't say much, he was pretty ticked about his glasses.

Well, it's bedtime. I think I'm going to go and snuggle with my favorite poo girl.